Quote of the Day (2008-11-20)

Narrator: Was it ticking? Airport Security Officer: Actually throwers don't worry about ticking 'cause modern bombs don't tick. Narrator: Sorry, throwers? Airport Security Officer: Baggage handlers. But, when a suitcase vibrates, then the throwers gotta call the police. Narrator: My suitcase was vibrating? Airport Security Officer: Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor, but every once in a while... [whispering] Airport Security Officer: it's a dildo. Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article a dildo, never your dildo. Narrator: I don't own... [Officer waves Narrator off]

Source: Fight Club